I love my family so much and would never trade them for the world, but I HATE watching TV or movies when both my daughter and husband are in the room. They are huge talkers and love to gab through the most important and/or intense scenes. This drives me crazy. The other option we have come up with is pausing while they have their philosophical conversation, but that too kills it for me. Like when reading a book, I like to lose myself in the story and the constant starting and stopping makes it very hard for me to do so. Forget it if it’s a show they really don’t like, then the conversation floodgates are open.
In the scheme of things in creating a life together and a loving family, the above matters very little. I bring this up because NOBODY is perfect. I’m certainly not.
I was talking to a guy friend the other day and he said something to the effect that he’s not sure if he can love someone for a lifetime because to feel that way everything has to be awesome. I laughed and said, “If you are expecting you partner in life to be perfect, just stay alone.” Then he asked, “What do you do if there is something you don’t like about your husband?” as if that was hard to fathom.
I believe if you like everything about another person then you’re either not being honest or you don’t know yourself very well and have taken on your partners likes and dislikes. What makes a great match is liking most of what your significant other brings to the table but certainly not everything.
I’m far from perfect and having to live up to that expectation would be a horrible way to live. Loving another person is loving their flaws too, even if they annoy you sometimes.
I’m sure there will be people in either camp when it comes to watching shows. Some people like it to be a more social event like my extroverted husband and daughter and others would like everyone in the room to shut the fuck up, like me! 😉
Perfection is highly overrated anyway. I like my friends and loves to be real and interesting. Let your freak flag fly!
Warm hugs,
Blakely
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Thanks for sharing these thoughts. I agree that it’s important to accept most of what your partner offers, but there has to be a few things that drive you crazy. I’ve always believed that if two people are exactly the same in all their tastes, habits and traits, than one of them may be unnecessary. I love my honey and we enjoy many of the same activities, but when he whistles through his teeth, I want to scream. On the flipside, he hates my favorite music. And somehow, we’ve made it through nearly nine years this way. Opposites may not attract, but these little differences help to build strong relationships.
In regards to the chatty family… I feel your pain. I’ve found that icy stares help, or just DVR-ing it and then watching it when you have a few moments alone, if you have a few minutes alone. Or maybe headphones? Good luck!
Hi Jessica,
Thanks so much for your comment. I agree that differences are important too.
Warm hugs,
Blakely