Tag Archives: writing

Mourning the end of the My Body Trilogy

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Sad-Love-Quotes-Desktop-WallpaperToday is the official release day of My Body-Mine, the last book of the My Body-Trilogy. I have completed novels and projects before, but this is the first time I have experienced a kind of sadness at the end. I’m pretty sure that the feeling stems from saying goodbye to Jane, my protagonist but maybe a little bit for Marcello as well.

I didn’t quite understand the phenomenon until I heard an interview with Daniel Day-Lewis. He spoke of his portrayal of Abraham Lincoln and how he missed seeing the world through his eyes.

I have been viewing the world through Jane’s eyes for a good bit of time now, three novels worth, and I will miss her, am missing her.

Some readers struggled with the fact that Jane stayed so long with Luke and yelled in their heads that she should get out, should run in the opposite direction, but Jane, like many women, chose to stay in a sometimes abusive relationship with the hopes that she would eventually get the love she truly needed. I love the story she set before me of struggle, self-reflection, perseverance and ultimate empowerment. Many of my readers have identified with her story and will be cheering her on in the end.

Some of my fans are hoping I write more of her journey in the future, however, Jane and I have parted company because I feel her story is complete, hence the mourning. On the bright side, if the trilogy does really well, I do have plans to write a prequel about Luke and Janice’s relationship prior to Jane. I personally would love to be in Luke’s mind and get to know more about him and his motivations.

I know as a reader, I have encountered this emotion before … of not wanting a book or a series to end. It’s rather more personal and intense on the writing side of things for me. There have been books, though, that I love so much, I had to read them again and still wish they wouldn’t come to an end. The Time Traveler’s Wife, Siddhartha and Replay come to mind.

Colin Firth put it so brilliantly: “When I’m really in to a novel, I’m seeing the world differently during that time – not just for the hour or so in the day when I get to read, I’m actually walking around in a bit of a haze, spellbound by the book and looking at everything through a different prism.”

Have you, as a writer or reader had the experience of mourning the end? Please share with us.

Warm hugs,

Blakely

Please feel free to friend me on Facebook.
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Blakely’s Friday Interview with M. Peters

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AuthorPhotoPlease give a warm welcome to M. Peters, author of Undisclosed Desire.

Tell us a bit about yourself and what you’re currently working on or promoting.  Currently, I’m working on promoting my first novel, Undisclosed Desire, while I write my second book, a followup to that novel.  It is untitled as of yet.

What genre is your book? Adult Paranormal Romance.  Do you write in other genres as well? I’ve just started a Horror/Crime novel that I’m six or seven thousand words into. It’s completely different to what I normally write, and I’m enjoying the challenge.  Coming this week, snippets of that work and the sequel to Undisclosed Desire will be placed on my website.

Who or what inspires you? My soulmate inspires me – she and I have been together since we were sixteen years old, and we write together almost every day.

What advice do you have for writers just starting out?  Only you can write this story, in your own words, in your own way.  Also – edit LATER. Write first; there’s all the time in the world to edit later.

Do you set writing goals and if so, what are they?  Recently, my fiancée and I just finished our own sort of homage to November’s National Novel Writing Month – NaNoWriMo – in which you write 50,000 words of a new novel in one month – except that we only set ourselves the goal of writing 25,000 words.  And we’re trying to keep up a goal of writing five hundred words a day, just to keep our writing muscles flexing.

Do you outline your stories or just go with the flow?  I am an utter go-with-the-flow kind of writer.  I never understood the needs for writing outlines in school. I just made up the story around the prompts – and I do the same thing now. Pictures, music, a snippet of dialogue when I am out and about – they’re all inspirations.

Who is your favorite author and why?  Probably Stephen King, if I’m not allowed to quote my fiancée here, since she’s a writer, too.

Do you see yourself in any of your characters?  All writers set a little bit of themselves in their characters – we can’t help it.  While sometimes it’s no more than a quirk of their personality, every single one of our characters has some part of ourselves sewn into their makeup.

Was one of your characters more challenging to write than another?  I find very assertive characters a challenge to write unless the people in question are supposed to come off as distastefully arrogant, because I have a problem with assertiveness in my own life.

What do you do when you’re not writing?  I’m always writing – there’s never a moment where I’m not analyzing a bit of dialogue or being inspired by a snatch of song.  I file things away in my head.

What do you do to stay sane as a writer?  I write. The promotion and the editing are what drive me nuts the most.  It’s draining.

Do you read your reviews and if so, how do you cope with a bad one?  I do read my reviews, but so far, I’m lucky not to have had a ‘bad’ one.  It’s all someone else’s opinion, I guess – but telling myself that doesn’t mean I won’t fly off the handle the first time I do get a bad review.

I have found the writer’s community to be very supportive and welcoming.  Please share three writers that you recommend for us to check out.

  1. Megan Peters – the author of  The Hawk Prince
  2. The Ladies In Waiting of the Behind Closed Doors Website: I know there are actually five of us (including myself) listed here, but I just can’t make the choice between them!  All four of them (Nya Rawlyns is a pen name of one of the other ladies) have been fantastically helpful and are wonderful writers that you’ve just got to check out for yourselves.

  3. My third choice of an author is a little bittersweet. She and I co-wrote her first three novels and we were working on her fourth novel when she passed away in January of this year. Linda Eble Swain:

Please be sure to like M. Peters Facebook Page, follow her on Twitter and check out her webpage.

 Click below to buy Undisclosed Desires.

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The Power of Love and Hugs

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tumblr_m8ki1hKNrh1rclhx0o1_250Don Juan DeMarco is a favorite movie of my husband’s and he watches it every few years. He watched it a few days ago as I tackled my social media and at the very end, this quote caught my imagination. “… (Don Juan) suffered from a romanticism which was completely incurable and even worse, highly contagious.” I think I’ve caught it. 😉

Imagine if love was contagious like an air borne disease. Wouldn’t that be glorious? Can you picture it? You’re walking down the street, minding your own business and you look up and find a couple in front of you making out. Like a spell cast, you head back home to find your wife and you wrap her up in a big warm hug. “I just had to tell you how much I love you,” you say.

We already know, from many studies, that hate is infectious. I assume most people are familiar with the blue-eyes, brown eyes experiment that Jane Elliot developed and used on her third grade class. If not, there are several articles online. The short version is that she split her class into two groups based on eye color and treated each group differently. The lesson was set out to teach about discrimination most especially regarding how black people were treated in the 60s. The experiment showed how easily we can group together against another community of people based on contrived cultural biases.

Why doesn’t it work the other way? Why isn’t love contagious?

Although it may not be contagious, we still feel its influence. We feel enriched when we hear of a great true love story and I, for one, never tire of hearing them. My husband and I have been told that our love is inspiring and gives people hope. I don’t think there is a bigger compliment than being an inspiration to someone else.

We are part of a wonderful community—two actually—where we share affection in the form of hugs with our friends. Hugs are a wonderful way to connect with those you love and care about. A warm embrace can shift a bad mood and/or make a person feel far less alone.

Check out this video on Free Hugs (It makes me cry every time):

 

Like love, hugs should be catching. Mata Amritanandamayi, otherwise known as the hugging saint, understands the power of the hug and has shared her physical embrace with millions of people.

Annie, my black stripped tiger kitty is lying across half of my lap and has her paw extended touching my right forearm. My left arm is draped over her back as I type and she is purring loudly. Just as she needs her daily affection, so do we. She is also brilliant at giving hugs. She loves to lay across my shoulder and press her head against my neck.

In the final book of the My Body Trilogy, Jane finally understands one of life’s most important lessons about love and connection.  That’s all I’m going to share about that. 😉 But suffice it to say, we could all use a little more true love and affection infection each and every day.  I hope we all “catch” the love bug and share it regularly.

Very warm hugs,

Blakely

Please feel free to friend me on Facebook.
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Blakely’s Friday Interviews with Ifedayo Akintomide

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Please give a warm welcome to Ifedayo Akintomide, author of Without a Voice.

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Tell us a bit about yourself and what you’re currently working on or promoting.
My name is Akintomide Ifedayo Adigwe. I am a Nigerian and thirty three years old. Been writing for over ten years now and I guess this comes as a result of the urge to scribble. I love telling stories and I have been telling them long before I even picked up a pen to write. I am working on my first science fiction novel entitled Amnesiacs and I am currently promoting my book Without a Voice which is based on the human trafficking scourge ravaging the world today. It is told from the perspectives of two sixteen year old girls.

What genre is your book? Do you write in other genres as well?
I think crime thriller would about cover it. Though there is a hint of drama in there too. I have written books of fantasy too. A trilogy called Konga which is loosely based on the myths and legends of western Africa which is where I am from.

Who or what inspires you? Has a dream every inspired any of your stories?
I think God and the holy spirit are my biggest inspirations. Truth be told I can’t think of anything else that could be giving me the inspiration. Some of my ideas are … let’s just say extra creative. lol
A vision has inspired one of my books. The name of the book is The Divide. A crime political thriller based on the events happening in my country Nigeria.

Do you have an agent and/or publisher or are you self-published? If self-published, do you use a professional editor? If traditionally published, who is your publisher?
I am self-published but I do use editing services.

Do you use test readers? If so, how many?
I most definitely use test readers. Three or four on average.

What advice do you have for writer’s just starting out?
Keep doing what you are doing. It’s a hard business but with diligence and patience you will make your mark. Never let anyone ever tell you it’s impossible. A wise man once said the impossible is simply the untried.

Do you set writing goals and if so, what are they?
No I don’t. Don’t like to put too much pressure on myself. Churning a book out is pressure enough.

Do you outline your stories or just go with the flow?
I used to go with the flow. But now with the last three books I have written the whole idea from start to finish which simply drops into my head. Not sure how that works exactly but that’s the way it is for me now.

What does your writing space look like?
Cluttered! Filled with odds and ends.

Do you have any writing rituals or interesting writing quirks?
Besides loud music in my ears I don’t think I have any quirks or rituals.

What are your three favorite books including the authors?
Harry Potter series – JK Rowlings – Superbly written
The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown – well crafted and a very intelligent read
Mr Murder – Dean Koontz – his scare factor is off the chain

Who is your favorite author and why?
Don’t really have a favorite author. I enjoy a whole bunch of books by different authors.

What project are you currently working on?
My first science fiction novel entitled Amnesiacs.

Is being an author your dream job? If so, how long have you been chasing the dream? If not, what would be your dream job?
Being an author has always been my dream job. And I have been chasing my passion for over ten years now.

What book are you currently reading?
Making the Most of Opportunity by Bishop David Abioye

Please be sure to like Ifedayo’s page on Facebook, and check out all the books he has for sale on Smashwords and Lulu!

Click below to buy Without a Voice.

Cover for 'Without a Voice'

Push Through or Walk Away?

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walking a clear pathI consider myself to be self-reflective. I try to look past what I’m doing to why I’m doing it or why I’m reacting. I also like to explore what motivates a particular response or even how I can behave differently.

The hardest part for me is when I continuously hit up against the same stimulus with the same response even though I am working hard to move past it.  It’s the most frustrating when I feel like I have grown only to find my emotions stirred up again in the same way as before.

In the past, I have held this belief that I can move past any issue if I’m willing to dig to the core of me. Because of this I sometimes take on more of the responsibility when an issue comes up than may be warranted (according to my husband).

Now I realized that sometimes the best thing, the healthiest thing, is to move away from the stimulus. I don’t mean from a ‘hiding’ standpoint but from acknowledging that the situation isn’t healthy and it’s time to move on. I had previously held the position that moving through the issue was always the best way to go but now I’m not so sure that’s always the right course of action. Reactions aren’t always just the mirror of our past but maybe a way of protecting us in the present.

Anytime I have a reaction that I don’t like, I tend to assume that I need to do something to change the circumstance or myself. Maybe all I need to do is remove myself from the situation. Unfortunately, it’s not always so black and white and easily discernible.

If you’ve read my novels, then you can probably see where Jane gets her introspection. I played with this concept of trying to evolve past the current situation. Sometimes we must, even in the case of family and friends, extract ourselves from the situations that don’t support us and our wellbeing. You will see Jane evolve in this manner throughout the arc of the trilogy.

The best example I can think of to illustrate the challenge happened when I worked in “corporate America.” I had a job and a half to get done in the traditional 40 hour week and as much as I tried and struggled, I couldn’t handle the stress of all the work not getting done that kept getting heaped on my plate. I had to rush from one thing to another never fully feeling satisfied with the outcome. Being away from the situation, I can now easily see that the job was an awful fit for me and the struggles I put myself through were simply me trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. Back then though, I truly thought I should be able to change something within myself to make it work.

Fortunately, I now get to chase the dream of a published author (thanks to my wonderful husband) and that is far more satisfying. There are still times I run up against myself and other people’s personalities but at least I’m working for myself now and setting my own schedule.

Life continues to astound and amaze me and I am fascinated to continually learn more about the facets of myself and others.

How do you handle something you would like to change about yourself? Do you spend the time trying to figure out what motivates you?

Thanks for reading and please share your comments.

Warm hugs,

Blakely

Please feel free to friend me on Facebook.
And follow the My Body Trilogy Facebook page.
Find me Twitter & Pinterest.

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Blakely’s Friday Interview with Lynne Stringer

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Lynne1-editedPlease give a warm welcome to Lynne Stringer, author of The Heir.

Tell us a bit about yourself and what you’re currently working on or promoting.
My name is Lynne Stringer and I live in Australia with my family. I’ve been interested in writing for most of my life. My father’s a writer, although he favours non-fiction books and I gravitate more towards fiction. I have worked as a journalist for a small magazine, which I also edited for seven years. However, I have always loved making up stories, so it was only a matter of time before I turned my attention to novels. My first novel, The Heir, is out on 1st June. It’s the first book in the Verindon trilogy.
What genre is your book? Do you write in other genres as well?
The Heir is a young adult, science fiction romance. I would be open to writing in just about any genre if I had the inspiration for a story, but I do like both sci-fi and romance. I think anything I wrote would have to have a love story in it somewhere.
Do you have an agent and/or publisher or are you self-published? If self-published, do you use a professional editor? If traditionally published, who is your publisher?
I don’t have an agent, although I did try to get one. Getting an agent is definitely harder than getting published! My publisher, Wombat Books, is a traditional publisher, which I’m happy with, especially since it meant that my book received much needed attention before it was published. It went through six different editors before we were happy with the end result. I would recommend editing for every author. There are always things you miss when looking at your own work, and if you’re self-publishing you’re not going to have a publisher to do if for you. Having your book professionally edited is a must. I’ve seen too many books with an appalling number of mistakes in them simply because they haven’t had a proper edit.
Do you outline your stories or just go with the flow?
I tend to go with the flow. I find that my stories sometimes alter once the characters start speaking, so it seems pointless to map something out when I might have to change it anyway.
What project are you currently working on?
I’m currently working on the sequel to The Heir. The Crown should be released either at the end of this year or the beginning of the next.
Is being an author your dream job? If so, how long have you been chasing the dream? If not, what would be your dream job?
Yes, it is my dream job. My hope is that I will make enough money to live off it (unlikely, I know!). I can’t think of anything better than being paid to make up stories. I’ve always done it for fun, it would be wonderful to earn a living that way.
How much time a day do you spend on social media?
A lot. I live in Australia, but part of my book is set in America, so I have been trying to reach out to that audience through social media. I am active on Facebook, Twitter, Goodreads and Pinterest.
Is there a message in your book(s) that you want readers to grasp?
I’m trying to drive home the message that we should not judge people by standards like success and wealth. In the story, Sarah, my protagonist, is ostracised at the school she attends because she’s not wealthy or from a successful family. However, she is definitely a person worth knowing. Basing our view of people on such shallow standards is not a good idea, although it’s an easy trap to fall into.

Please be sure to friend Lynne Stringer on Facebook, Twitter and check out her Pinterest and Goodreads!

Click below to buy The Heir.

Fuzzy Wassy was a Bear

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So please tell me, am I the only person who has issues with the overuse of the word was? All the books I have read on writing say to use an action verb wherever possible and yet when I read— most novels are a was and were-athon. It really drives me mad when there is more than one was in a sentence or where the active verb is so apparent. For instance: “She was standing in a pool of water as I approached” can simply become, “As I approached, I discovered her standing in a pool of water.”

I have no issues with it in dialogue because that’s how we really speak but in description I often feel it is just plain lazy. I’m the first to admit, there are times where it’s unavoidable, especially in first-person narrative during reflection.

Could it be that the passive voice, which has been touted as being inferior, is a notion out of the past and really doesn’t apply anymore? If so, I say we change the propaganda and move right along. However, if the active voice is really better writing, then shouldn’t we, as writers, focus on writing with action verbs more often?

Stephen King does a lovely little rant about the passive voice and was-ing in his great book on writing called, On Writing, A Memoir of the Craft. He believes that the passive voice is weak storytelling. He gives a few great examples and I’ll share one with you where he referenced The Elements of Style, another must have book for any writer. Stephen writes: “And remember: The writer threw the rope, not The rope was thrown by the writer.” He begs, “Please oh please?” afterwards which I found very humorous.

So why am I even ranting about this? Very glad you asked! I personally feel that the standards of writing are important and raising our craft to the highest level we can is a goal we should all aspire to. I hope my writing gets better each time I write a new novel and that I stay open to learning new things. Being able to tell a great story is only part of the puzzle, the other half is conveying it in such a way that the reader can get lost in it.

Because I know there is always more than one side to any issue, I will share a book that broke all grammatical rules and I highly enjoyed it. My Friend Leonard is a memoir by James Frey who used none of what you normally find when reading a story and somehow it worked. Check it out so you can see what I mean.

Lastly, I want to mention adverbs and how abhorrent most writing books find them. Again, I have heard it called lazy writing, thanks Mr. King and Elmore Leonard. The latter believes that adverbs should generally be avoided and one should never use the word suddenly. I have to disagree because in their proper places, I find them to be lovely additions that emphasize a thought, convey a heightened circumstance or modify a weaker action verb. There, I’ve said it.

Please share with us your thoughts and ideas about best writing practices. I’d love to hear from you.

Warm hugs,

Blakely

Please feel free to friend me on Facebook.
And follow the My Body Trilogy Facebook page.
Find me Twitter & Pinterest.

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Blakely’s Friday Interview with Darlene Kuncytes

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92682d8e85ea0ac1d188dc.L._V372479113_SX200_Please give a warm welcome to Darlene Kuncytes, author of A Vampire’s Saving Embrace. She is brave enough to be my very first author interview. Thanks, Dar. 🙂

Tell us a bit about yourself and what you’re currently working on or promoting.
I am promoting my first book. “A Vampire’s Saving Embrace” and working on Book 2 of the series. Although this book totally stands on its own. Book 2 is the story of two of the secondary characters you will meet in book 1. I had people beg me to write their story next – so I just had to.
What genre is your book? Do you write in other genres as well? It’s a paranormal romance – heavy on the romance! Lol! Yes, I have also done an outline for a Suspense/Romance that is not paranormal.
Who or what inspires you? Life inspires me. Daydreams, music – people.
Has a dream every inspired any of your stories? Yes! Totally! Lol! I will have a dream and wake up thinking “Whoa – what an awesome idea!”
Do you have an agent and/or publisher or are you self-published? If self-published, do you use a professional editor? If traditionally published, who is your publisher? I am self-published, but Linda Boulanger is my cover artist and helped with the editing. She is awesome!
What advice do you have for writer’s just starting out? Never give up! And read and re-read everything! lol
Do you set writing goals and if so, what are they? I don’t. I don’t ever want to feel pressured. I think that takes away from the story I’m trying to tell if I am forcing myself. It has to flow for me, and there is no controlling that.
What does your writing space look like? A mess!
Do you have any writing rituals or interesting writing quirks? Not really, I just need a cup of coffee at my side – and I do LOVE sitting outside at night writing. I love that peace and quiet.
What are your three favorite books including the authors? Wow, there are so many. Stephen King’s – The Shining and Salem’s Lot. John Saul -Suffer the Children (I did a book report on that book in the 6th grade – needless to say the class and teacher were a bit shocked! But, in my defense my teacher did tell me that my reading was so advanced that I could pick out any book I wanted to read, and do a report on. Lol) Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
What project are you currently working on? Book two in my series. “A Wolf’s Savage Embrace” I am hoping to launch that in August. I actually have a few Facebook Stalkers that are hounding me for it!! lol!! And I LOVE it!
Is being an author your dream job? If so, how long have you been chasing the dream? If not, what would be your dream job? It is totally my dream job! I have always loved writing and have dreamed of being an author since I can remember – so this has been number one on my bucket list forever!
What has been your best moment as a writer? My first review by someone that I didn’t know, and it was awesome! What a thrill! It gave me chills to hear them say that they fell in love with my characters and couldn’t wait for more.
What challenges have you faced in your writing career? Time. I work full time and there never seems to be enough time in the day to do everything I want to do. But it’s all good!
Do you see yourself in any of your characters? To a point I do – in all of them. They come from my heart and soul, so yes; there are responses and actions that are completely me. And there might be a little of my exes here and there, lol – but not much.
What do you do when you’re not writing? Read, cook, swim. I foster and rescue puppymill dogs.
How much time a day do you spend on social media? Much too much! 😉 I couldn’t even guess – but it’s a lot!
What do you do to stay sane as a writer? Who says I’m sane?? Lol!! But I take breaks, drink coffee and listen to music.
Do you read your reviews and if so, how do you cope with a bad one?
I have been lucky in the sense that I haven’t really gotten a super bad one yet, but I was in tears when I read the first one that said it was eh. But I am working on thickening my skin.
What has been the toughest criticism given to you as an author? What has been the best compliment? That a character said something WAY too much, when it was only said like 3 times. The best has been a woman that said she couldn’t BREATHE during a scene, that it was beyond amazing, and I didn’t use any of her “hate words”. And that she loved, loved, loved the book! And then said – Oh, and did I mention that I LOVED it! That just made my day!

I have found the writer’s community to be very supportive and welcoming.  Please share three writers that you recommend:

Donna Hawk, Virginia McKevitt, and M.C. Lavocat

Please be sure to become Darlene Kuncytes’s fan on Facebook, Twitter and check out her Author’s pages on Amazon and Goodreads!

Click below to buy A Vampire’s Saving Embrace

Darlene

How Important is Context and Punctuation?

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VERY!  Moreover, this has become even clearer to me as of late, so I wanted to share with you something that recently happened.  I found the experience rather hysterical (afterwards) and you should have seen the expression on my husband’s face.

Here’s my story:

My writer friend, Leanna Harrow, wrote a very funny post about chocolate and with her permission, I’m sharing it with you:

Me: Mmmmm…I’m going to eat one of those…
Myself: You don’t need one of those…
I: Oh! Can I have one too?
Me: No you can’t! I’m going to eat one! I’m sick of listening to myself, I’m always listening to myself, doing the right thing, being nice, eating the “right” things. ENOUGH! I’m going to treat myself regardless what anyone thinks…I deserve it!
Myself: That’s a selfish and self-serving attitude…what’s with you? You’re not usually like this.
I: She’s getting her period…

Myself: Oh God! Then we should eat the whole box and shut her the hell up.

So I commented under her funny post: LMAO! Let me have one!

When I’m checking my email later, I see a comment from Leanna but there’s no context to it and my husband reads it over my shoulder. It says: Did you not hear how selfish she is Author Blakely Bennett??? She’s a real bitch…and not the Beautiful Intelligent Talented Charming Honest kind! Lol

Without the context of the story and my quote, it seems like a horrible slam against me and yet in the correct context, it’s hysterical.

As for punctuation? Punctuation is as important as context to understanding the meaning. I had a brief stint in an online writers group where there was a lot of talk about editing and punctuation and how the standards, for many of the participants, didn’t matter.  Well they matter to me and here’s a good illustration of why:

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Enough said?  Maybe not. 🙂 lol! Editing is an important function in a great story. Grammar and punctuation are the framework for expressing your narrative in a clear and enjoyable manner. You never want to throw your reader out of the story because of strange context or bad grammar.  At least, I surely don’t.

Thanks to Leanna for allowing me to share her Facebook post (very funny stuff).  As always, everyone loves to read your comments and hear about your experiences. Take a moment and let us hear from you.  What’s the weirdest comma dysfunction you have seen? Make us laugh!

Warm hugs,

Blakely

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Our Own Worst Critics

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Not long ago, my husband and I had a discussion about how I perceive myself and my body in contrast to how he perceives me. During that discussion, I truly wished that I could see myself through his eyes. Even for an hour, if I could see myself the way he sees me, I believe it would change my world forever.

Recently on my Facebook wall, I had the opportunity to read a poem that spoke to that very phenomenon so perfectly for me. Please follow this link to read the poem called Within by Michael Peter Smith aka Mikeywine:  http://mikeywine.wordpress.com/2013/04/17/within/

In addition, my wonderful step-daughter V, posted this incredible video where an artist sketches women based on their verbal description of themselves from behind a curtain and then based on another person’s take of them, someone whom they met just briefly. Call me sappy but the short video made me cry and I hope you’ll check it out as well: http://www.wimp.com/forensicartist/

Let me ask you why, as women, are we our harshest self-critics? I’m sure some men are as well but my general experience with the male gender is that they don’t waste much time wishing they would show up differently or that their bodies looked better. Why don’t we find satisfaction with our own uniqueness?

For myself, my weight fluctuated in my younger days and that had an impact on how I felt about myself on any given day. Fortunately the up and down of 50 lbs. has been reduced down to a 10-15 lbs. yo-yo depending on the season and my internal motivation. I don’t find it odd that we care about how we look since our appearance is what we present to the world, however, I must say, I’m looking forward to the day that my weight matters far less in my own self-evaluation.

In the My Body Trilogy, Jane’s view of herself changes and evolves through her character arc. Her mother often referred to her as Plain Jane in her childhood and that was the image she carried of herself until she met Luke and then Marcello.

As authors, being critiqued is unavoidable, and now anyone with Wifi can fancy themselves an anonymous expert. It’s imperative for our peace of mind that we maintain positive regard for ourselves and our work in the face negative criticism.

I know for me, early rejection as a child definitely affected how I viewed myself but as an adult I’d like to think I have something to say about how I perceive me, my life, and my writing.

At any rate, I plan to adopt my husband’s view, he who adores me and thinks I’m the coolest woman he knows. 🙂  Thanks love.

Are you a harsh self-critic?  Has your opinion of yourself evolved over time?  How do you handle negative reviews of your writing?

Warm hugs,

Blakely

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